II grew up in a church that believes that it is the one-true-church. I want to talk about my experience after I left and what it means to me to be free.
To begin with, I rebelled primarily against the dress code. I disliked the specific length of the dresses at the time (exactly two inches below the knee), I felt ugly in the colour of the head covering (black is a terrible colour for me) and the pins that were needed to keep my hair in place under the head covering were extremely uncomfortable. Some details of the dress code have changed over the years. However, the purpose of it has not. It is a powerful tool to keep control of the members. In reality, it probably has very little to do with modesty.
After I left, I rejected religion and all its trappings. Furthermore, I believed I didn't need God. I thought of him as a severe judge, similar to the ministers in the church I left. I married, confident in my ability to handle any situation. After several years of marriage, however, my husband and I went through some difficult times - life-altering events that proved that I was not in control of my life to the extent that I wanted to believe I was. Through people who followed Jesus Christ, I slowly began to understand the loving God who wanted a relationship with me. It was my pride that had kept me from God - not outward pride as I was taught to believe, but inward pride.
However, despite my now having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, the one-true-church belief was difficult to overcome. From a very young age, I understood that only those in the Holdeman church are on the right path, everyone else is on the way to damnation. This belief is a deep indoctrination and it was not easy for me to let go of it. I didn't choose this religion. I was born into it. Although I no longer wanted this religion, some part of me asked, "How could my parents, cousins, aunts and uncles all be wrong about this?" It was not until I studied the history of the church (started by John Holdeman in the middle of the 19th century) that I was able to understand the serious problems associated with his claim that his was the only way to God. That is why I wrote this book.
I am a mature woman who is actively engaged in living. I enjoy studying and learning. I tutor in English and above all, I love reading. I enjoy being a mother and grandmother and spending time in outdoor activities with my family. I also enjoy cooking and trying new cuisine.